help me!?...My wife is not beautiful and it is disturbing my sleep!!!

I have been married for a few years. During the first two years I was happy with my marriage and I loved my wife, but after that I started to feel that I disliked my wife. That is not because of religion, because she is religiously committed and has a good character, praise be to Allaah. Rather it has to do with her beauty, because she is not beautiful enough to keep me chaste and make me lower my gaze. I am afraid of mistreating her because I do not feel happy with her and sometimes I frown at her for no reason. The problem is that I cannot marry another wife because I am not financially able. I thought of taking a loan in order to marry but then I would be living in poverty because of the loan. I have thought a lot about divorcing her and letting her go in kindness and replacing her with another, but I have children from her and she loves me a lot. I have thought about this a great deal and it is disturbing my sleep, because I do not know what to do. What should I do, may Allaah reward you.

Praise be to Allaah.

My dear brother, I appreciate your confidence in me and I ask Allaah to make us and you strong and steadfast, and to guide us. With regard to your question, I offer the following comments:

1 – The problem you have is not with regard to marrying a second wife, or divorcing your wife. The problem, as you mention, is a financial problem. So long as you are not able to marry another wife, then you should keep the wife with whom Allaah has blessed you.

2 – Whenever you are able and have the financial means, and praise be to Allaah that He has permitted plural marriage to you… In my opinion that is easier for a woman to bear than divorce, especially since you have children from her.

3 – Try to look at the matter from a different angle. You may find many positive things in her, and beauty is not everything, believe me. How she behaves and treats you… and many things which are ultimately more important than appearance. For with time you will get used to her appearance, and how she behaves will be what matters…

4 – Imagine that you find a very beautiful woman and marry her… then she starts to treat you in an arrogant or impolite manner… or she treats you and your family badly… what would you do?!

5 – You should be objective and not burden yourself with more than you can bear. Look at the matter from different aspects. “it may be that you dislike a thing and Allaah brings through it a great deal of good” [al-Nisa’ 4:19 – interpretation of the meaning]. And remember the advice of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him): “Look for one [a wife] who is religiously committed, may your hands be rubbed with dust [i.e., may you prosper]!”

May Allaah help you, protect you and make you steadfast in following the path of goodness and truth.

Answered by Ahmad al-Muqbil

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pls read this. Kissing on the mouth among women

I have an important question which I hope you will answer. Please excuse us for this question, but we need to explain it to you so that we may avoid something haraam.
It has become very common among girls who claim Islamic sisterhood to kiss one another in an exaggerated fashion, such as kissing on the mouth or elsewhere, and they claim that this is part of complete love. When we explain to them that it is haraam, they say that there is no shar’i evidence to show that it is haraam, and that the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to bite the tongue of Zayd ibn Haarithah, and that they are prepared to stop doing this if they are shown any shar’i evidence that it is haraam.


Praise be to Allaah.

In order to establish a shar’i ruling, it is not essential that there be a text which speaks specifically of it in a Qur’aanic verse or a hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). There is no end to issues and new matters. Hence Islam has set out basic principles which cover thousands of issues and explain their rulings. These major principles include the principle of sadd al-dharaa’i (blocking the means). In I’laam al-Muwaqqi’een, Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) mentioned ninety-nine texts from the Qur’aan and Sunnah which point to the soundness of this principle. What is meant by “blocking the means” is that everything that is a means that leads to falling into something haraam is also forbidden, even if it is permissible in principal.

It is well known that Islam closes the door to things that lead to immorality, whether it is zina or perversions thereof such as homosexuality or lesbianism. Among the ways in which it has closed the door to that are the following:

Forbidding men to look at women and vice versa, forbidding a man to be alone with a non-mahram woman or to shake hands with her, forbidding a woman to travel alone, and so on. Another example is the way in which Islam closes the door to perversion and immorality that may occur between males or between women, so Islam forbids a woman to look at the ‘awrah of another woman, or a man to look at the ‘awrah of another man; it forbids sleeping in one bed beneath one cover; and it forbids looking, touching and kissing if that is done with desire, even between one woman and another, or between one man and another.

It was narrated from Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “No man should look at the ‘awrah of another man, and no woman should look at the ‘awrah of another woman. No man should lie down with another man beneath a single cover, and no woman should lie down with another woman beneath a single cover.” Narrated by Muslim (338).

The scholars have also clearly stated that this applies even between mahrams (close blood relatives). They have stated that it is forbidden for a father to kiss his daughter on the mouth and that it is even more forbidden for a brother to kiss his sister on the mouth, let alone other relatives.

Imam Ahmad was asked about a man kissing a woman who is his mahram. He said: If he has come from a journey and he does not fear that there may be any temptation. Ibn Muflih said: But he should never do that on the mouth; it should be on the cheek or on the head.

Al-Adaab al-Shar’iyyah (2/256)

Imam Ahmad has mentioned the following limitations with regard to kissing mahrams:

1 – There should be a special reason for it, such as having come from a journey.

2 – There should be no risk of fitnah (temptation).

Ibn Muflih (may Allaah have mercy on him) has explained an important point which is that there should be no kissing on the mouth, rather it should be on the cheek or head, because kissing the mouth has to do with desire, not the kissing of emotion such as that of a father or brother. This is clear to anyone who thinks about it.

In al-Iqnaa’ (3/156) it says:

There is nothing wrong with one who has come from a journey kissing his female mahrams, so long as he does not fear that there may be any temptation, but he should not kiss on the mouth, rather it should be on the forehead or head. End quote.

In al-Mawsoo’ah al-Fiqhiyyah (13/130) it says:

It is not permissible for a man to kiss the mouth or hand or anything else of another man, or for a woman to kiss another woman, or to embrace or touch their bodies, etc, if that is done by way of desire. There is no difference of opinion among the fuqaha’ on this matter …

But if that is not done on the mouth, and it is done by way of respect and honouring, or to express emotion upon meeting and parting, then there is nothing wrong with it. End quote.

If these are the words of our scholars and imams with regard to kissing mahrams such as a daughter, then how can they allow non-mahram females to kiss one another on the mouth on a daily basis, with no reason such as travelling or a lengthy absence?
It should be noted that we cannot find the hadeeth mentioned in the question about the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) biting the tongue of Zayd ibn Haarithah, and we do not know where this comes from.

In al-Tirmidhi (2732) it is narrated that ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) said: Zayd ibn Haarithah came to Madeenah and the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) was in my house. He came to him and knocked at the door, and the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) stood up and embraced him and kissed him.

But this is a da’eef (weak) hadeeth, which was classed as such by al-Albaani in Da’eef al-Tirmidhi.


And Allaah knows best.
Islam Q&A

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My wife is not very interested in intercourse.

I am a man of a strong desire. I like to have intercourse everyday. When I try to start it with my wife, she refuses for weak reasons like saying she is tired or lazy to make ghusl or because she wants to delay it to next day. So I have intercourse with her only twice a week. I cannot be patient. So I have to masturbate by my hand fearing to fall into adultery. Although I know it is haram, I masturbate about three times a week while my wife is beside me and she knows what I am doing. My wife cares a lot about beautifying herself and using perfumes, but she becomes annoyed if I ask her for sex. Am I sinful to masturbate by my hand? If yes, then does my wife share in this sin?.
Praise be to Allaah.

Firstly:

The husband has to treat his wife kindly, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“and live with them honourably”

[al-Nisa’ 4:19]

Part of living with one’s spouse honourably is having intercourse, which is obligatory upon the husband, as much as is sufficient to satisfy her, so long as it does not harm him physically or distract him from earning a living.

The wife is obliged to obey her husband if he calls her to his bed, and if she refuses then she is sinning, because of the report narrated by al-Bukhaari (32370 and Muslim (1436) from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him), that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a man calls his wife to his bed and she does not come to him, and he goes to sleep angry with her, the angels will curse her until morning.”

Shaykh al-Islam [Ibn Taymiyah] (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: She has to obey him if he calls her to his bed, and this is a duty that is obligatory upon her. … If she refuses to respond to his call, then she is being disobedient and wilfully defiant. … as Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“As to those women on whose part you see ill‑conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance”

[al-Nisa’ 4:34]

End quote from al-Fataawa al-Kubra (3/145, 146).

But it is not permissible for the husband to force his wife to do that for which she is not able with regard to intercourse. If she has an excuse because she is sick or she cannot bear it, then she is not sinning if she refuses to have intercourse.

Ibn Hazm (may Allaah have mercy on him) said: Both slave women and free women are enjoined not to refuse the master or husband if he calls them for intercourse, so long as the woman who is called is not menstruating or sick and likely to be harmed by intercourse, or observing an obligatory fast. If she refuses with no excuse then she is cursed. End quote from al-Muhalla (10/40).

Al-Bahooti (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

The husband has the right to enjoy his wife at any time, so long as that does not keep her from performing obligatory duties or harm her; he does not have the right to enjoy her in that case, because that is not part of living with them honourably. But if it does not distract her from that or cause her harm, then he has the right to enjoyment. End quote from Kashshaaf al-Qinaa’ (5/189).

The wife whose husband is harming her by having intercourse too often may come to some agreement with her husband concerning a specific number that she can put up with, and if he does more to such an extent that it is harmful to her, then she has the right to refer the matter to the qaadi (judge), who may determine a specific number and oblige both husband and wife to adhere to that.


Secondly: Masturbation (for both men and women) is haraam (forbidden) in Islam based on the following evidence: First from the Qur’aan: Imam Shafi’i stated that masturbation is forbidden based on the following verses from the Qur’aan (interpretation of the meaning): "And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts). Except from their wives or (the captives and slaves) that their right hands possess, - for them, they are free from blame. But whoever seeks beyond that, then those are the transgressors." 23.5-7 Here the verses are clear in forbidding all illegal sexual acts (including masturbation) except for the wives or that their right hand possess. And whoever seeks beyond that is the transgressor. "And let those who find not the financial means for marriage keep themselves chaste, until Allah enriches them of His bounty." 24.33. This verse also clearly orders whoever does not have the financial means to marry to keep himself chaste and be patient in facing temptations (including masturbation) until Allah enriches them of His bounty. Secondly, from the sunnah of the Prophet (peace be upon him): Abdullaah ibn Mas’ood said, "We were with the Prophet while we were young and had no wealth whatsoever. So Allaah’s Messenger said, "O young people! Whoever among you can marry, should marry, because it helps him lower his gaze and guard his modesty (i.e. his private parts from committing illegal sexual intercourse etc.), and whoever is not able to marry, should fast, as fasting diminishes his sexual power." Bukhari:5066. The hadeeth orders men who are not able to marry to fast despite the hardship encountered in doing so, and not to masturbate despite the ease with which it can be done.

There is no sin if the husband is masturbated by his wife’s hand, because it is permissible for him to enjoy her; the same applies if he ejaculates outside the vagina, because of the general meaning of the verse in which Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And those who guard their chastity (i.e. private parts, from illegal sexual acts)

6. Except from their wives or (the slaves) that their right hands possess, __ for then, they are free from blame”

[al-Mu’minoon 23:5,6].

If the wife will be harmed by intercourse, she will not be harmed if her husband enjoys her in other ways, so she has to allow him to do that.

Both spouses have to tackle this problem in a kind, loving and frank manner; and each of them should understand the rights and duties that they have, because most marital problems stem from ignorance of that.

Some husbands are keen to satisfy their own desires, and they hasten to do that without caring about their wives or paying attention to their right to pleasure, so the wife finds no enjoyment in it and is put off by it, and it becomes a problem and a burden for her.

Hence we say: Strive to create love and affection between you and your wife; pay attention to her situation and understand her feelings; avoid that which will harm her or hurt her. Tell her of the shar’i ruling concerning this issue and help her to follow it, and do not put her off, and be moderate in your approach, and you will get what you want.

May Allaah help us and you to obey Him and seek His pleasure.

And Allaah knows best.
Islam Q&A

Why does Islam forbid lesbianism and homosexuality?

Could you please tell me that why is a homosexuality a sin in islam? I know it’s a great sin but my question is why? I haven't able to find the real reason why? So، if you could can you also tell me that what Allah has says in Quran or in hadith about it. Please let me know as soon as possible.

Praise be to Allaah.

The Muslim should not doubt, even for an instant, that what Allaah has prescribed is wise. He should know that there is great wisdom in what Allaah has commanded and what He has forbidden; it is the straight path and is the only way in which man can be safe and at peace, protecting his honour, his mind and his health, in accordance with the natural disposition (fitrah) with which Allaah has created man.

Some heretics have tried to attack Islam and its rulings; they have denounced divorce and plural marriage and permitted alcohol. Those who look at the state of their societies will see the state of misery which those societies have reached.

When they rejected divorce, murder took its place. When they rejected plural marriage, men started to take mistresses instead. When they allowed alcohol, all kinds of shameful and immoral actions became widespread.

They (gays and lesbians) both go against the natural disposition (fitrah) which Allaah has created in mankind – and also in animals – whereby the male is inclined towards the female, and vice versa.
Whoever goes against that goes against the natural disposition of mankind, the fitrah.

The spread of homosexuality has caused man diseases which neither the east nor the west can deny exist because of them. Even if the only result of this perversion was AIDS – which attacks the immune system in humans – that would be enough.

It also causes the breakup of the family and leads people to give up their work and study because they are preoccupied with these perversions.

Since the prohibition has come from his Lord, the Muslim should not wait until medicine proves that harm befalls the one who does that which Allaah has forbidden. Rather he must believe firmly that Allaah only prescribes that which is good for people, and these modern discoveries should only increase his certainty and confidence in the greatness of Allaah’s wisdom.

Ibn al-Qayyim said:

Both of them – fornication and homosexuality – involve immorality that goes against the wisdom of Allaah’s creation and commandment. For homosexuality involves innumerable evil and harms, and the one to whom it is done would be better off being killed than having this done to him, because after that he will become so evil and so corrupt that there can be no hope of his being reformed, and all good is lost for him, and he will no longer feel any shame before Allaah or before His creation. The semen of the one who did that to him will act as a poison on his body and soul. The scholars differed as to whether the one to whom it is done will ever enter Paradise. There are two opinions which I heard Shaykh al-Islam (may Allaah have mercy on him) narrate.”

(al-Jawaab al-Kaafi, p. 115).

2. Lesbianism means one woman doing to another something like that which a man does to a woman. Homosexuality means having intercourse with males in the back passage. This was the action of the accursed people of the Prophet of Allaah Loot (peace be upon him). In sharee’ah terminology it refers to inserting the tip of the penis into the anus of a male.

What is mentioned concerning these actions in the Qur’aan and Sunnah:

A – Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And (remember) Loot (Lot), when he said to his people: ‘Do you commit the worst sin such as none preceding you has committed in the ‘Aalameen (mankind and jinn)?

Verily, you practise your lusts on men instead of women. Nay, but you are a people transgressing beyond bounds (by committing great sins)’”

[al-A’raaf 7:80-81]

B – “Verily, We sent against them a violent storm of stones (which destroyed them all), except the family of Loot (Lot), them We saved in the last hour of the night”

[al-Qamar 54:34 – interpretation of the meaning]

C – “And (remember) Loot (Lot), when he said to his people: ‘Do you commit the worst sin such as none preceding you has committed in the ‘Aalameen (mankind and jinn)?”

[al-A’raaf 7:80 – interpretation of the meaning]

And Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“And (remember) Loot (Lot), when he said to his people: ‘You commit Al‑Faahishah (sodomy the worst sin) which none has preceded you in (committing) it in the ‘Aalameen (mankind and jinn)’”

[al-‘Ankaboot 29:28]

D – “And (remember) Loot (Lot), We gave him Hukm (right judgement of the affairs and Prophethood) and (religious) knowledge, and We saved him from the town (folk) who practised Al‑Khabaa’ith (evil, wicked and filthy deeds). Verily, they were a people given to evil, and were Faasiqoon (rebellious, disobedient to Allaah)”

[al-Anbiya’ 21:74 – interpretation of the meaning]

E – “And (remember) Loot (Lot)! When he said to his people, ‘Do you commit Al‑Faahishah (evil, great sin, every kind of unlawful sexual intercourse, sodomy) while you see (one another doing evil without any screen)

Do you practise your lusts on men instead of women? Nay, but you are a people who behave senselessly.’

There was no other answer given by his people except that they said: ‘Drive out the family of Loot (Lot) from your city. Verily, these are men who want to be clean and pure!’

So We saved him and his family, except his wife. We destined her to be of those who remained behind.

And We rained down on them a rain (of stones). So evil was the rain of those who were warned”

[al-Naml 27:54-58 – interpretation of the meaning]

These verses refer to the punishment that befell the people of Loot. With regard to the rulings on them:

F – Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning]:

“And the two persons (man and woman) among you who commit illegal sexual intercourse, hurt them both. And if they repent (promise Allaah that they will never repeat, i.e. commit illegal sexual intercourse and other similar sins) and do righteous good deeds, leave them alone. Surely, Allaah is Ever All-Forgiving (the One Who forgives and accepts repentance), (and He is) Most Merciful”

[al-Nisa’ 4:16]

Ibn Katheer said:

“The words of Allaah ‘And the two persons (man and woman) among you who commit illegal sexual intercourse, hurt them both’ mean, those who commit immoral actions, punish them both. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him), Sa’eed ibn Jubayr and others said: By condemning them, shaming them and hitting them with shoes. This was the ruling until Allaah abrogated it and replaced it with whipping and stoning. ‘Ikrimah, ‘Ata, al-Hasan and ‘Abd-Allaah ibn Katheer said: This was revealed concerning a man and woman who commit fornication. Al-Saddi said, it was revealed concerning young people before they get married. Mujaahid said: it was revealed concerning two men if they admit it bluntly; a hint is not sufficient – as if he was referring to homosexuality. And Allaah knows best.”

(Tafseer Ibn Katheer, 1/463).

G – It was narrated that Jaabir (may Allaah be pleased with him): “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘There is nothing I fear for my ummah more than the deed of the people of Loot.’”

(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1457; Ibn Maajah, 2563. This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani (may Allaah have mercy on him) in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 1552).

H – It was narrated that Ibn ‘Abbaas said: “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “… cursed is the one who has intercourse with an animal, cursed is the one who does the action of the people of Loot.”

(Narrated by Ahmad, 1878. This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 5891).

I – It was narrated that Ibn ‘Abbaas said: “The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: ‘Whoever you find doing the deed of the people of Loot, kill the one who does it and the one to whom it is done.”

(Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 1456; Abu Dawood, 4462; Ibn Maajah, 2561. This hadeeth was classed as saheeh by Shaykh al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’, no. 6589).

And Allaah knows best.


Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

Ooh!! I'm wondering !!Will men in Paradise have intercourse with al-hoor aliyn?!!

I'm wondering will the men from amongst the human race that enters paradise, will they have sexual intercourse with the "HOURIS" women in the paradise .

Praise be to Allaah.

Allaah has prepared for His believing slaves in Paradise that which no eye has seen, no ear has heard and has never even crossed the minds of men, such that even the person who has the least blessings in Paradise will think that he is the most blessed among them. Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri (may Allaah be pleased with him) said that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The lowest of people in status in Paradise will be a man whose face Allaah turns away from the Fire towards Paradise, and shows him a tree giving shade. He will say, ‘O Lord, bring me closer to that tree so that I may be in its shade… Then he will enter his house [in Paradise] and his two wives from among al-hoor al-‘iyn will come in and will say to him, ‘Praise be to Allaah who brought you to life for us and brought us to life for you.’ Then he will say, ‘No one has been given what I have been given.’” (Narrated by Muslim, no. 275)

Among the blessings that Allaah has prepared for His slaves are al-hoor al-‘iyn. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“So (it will be). And We shall marry them to Hoor (fair females) with wide lovely eyes”

[al-Dhukhaan 44:54]

“They will recline (with ease) on thrones arranged in ranks. And We shall marry them to Hoor (fair females) with wide lovely eyes

[al-Toor 52:20]

Al-hoor al-‘iyn are extremely beautiful, such that the marrow of their shins will be visible from beneath their garments. Every man who enters Paradise will have two wives from among al-hoor al-‘iyn. Allaah says, describing them (interpretation of the meaning):

“Therein (Gardens) will be Khayraatun‑Hisaan [fair (wives) good and beautiful];

Then which of the Blessings of your Lord will you both (jinn and men) deny?

Hoor (beautiful, fair females) guarded in pavilions;

Then which of the Blessings of your Lord will you both (jinn and men) deny?

With whom no man or jinni has had Tamth [opening their hymens with sexual intercourse] before them.

Then which of the Blessings of your Lord will you both (jinn and men) deny?

Reclining on green cushions and rich beautiful mattresses.”

[al-Rahmaan 55:70-76]

“And (there will be) Hoor (fair females) with wide lovely eyes (as wives for Al-Muttaqoon – the pious).

Like unto preserved pearls”

[al-Waaqi’ah 56:22-23]

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The first group will enter Paradise looking like the moon on the night when it is full, and those who follow them will be like the brightest shining star in the sky. Their hearts will be as one, and there will be no hatred or jealousy among them. Each man will have two wives from among al-hoor al-‘iyn, the marrow of whose calves can be seen from beneath the bone and flesh.” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, no. 3014)

It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: “I heard the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) say: ‘Going out and coming back for the sake of Allaah is better than this world and all that is in it. And a spot the size of the bow of one of you in Paradise – or a spot the size of his whip – is better than this world and all that is in it. If a woman from among the people of Paradise were to look at the people of this earth, she would light up all that is in between them and fill it with fragrance. The veil on her head is better than this world and all that is in it.’” (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, no. 2587)

A man will have intercourse in Paradise with his wives from among al-hoor al-‘iyn and his wives from among the people of this world, if they enter Paradise with him. A man will be given the strength of a hundred men to eat, drink, feel desire and have sexual intercourse. It was narrated from Anas (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The believer in Paradise will be given such and such strength for sexual intercourse.” He was asked, “O Messenger of Allaah, will he really be able to do that?” He said, “He will be given the strength of one hundred (men).” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, no. 2459. He said, (it is) saheeh ghareeb).

It was narrated from Zayd ibn Arqam that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “A man among the people of Paradise will be given the strength of a hundred men for eating, drinking, desire and sexual intercourse. A man among the Jews said, ‘The one who eats or drinks needs to excrete!’ The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said to him: ‘The excretion of any one of them will be in the form of sweat which comes out through his skin, then his stomach will reduce in size again.’” (Narrated by Ahmad, no. 18509; al-Daarimi, no. 2704)

The mufassireen said concerning the phrase “busy in joyful things” (Yaa-Seen 36:55 – interpretation of the meaning):

‘Abd-Allaah ibn Mas’ood and Ibn ‘Abbaas (mayAllaah be pleased with them both), and Sa’eed ibn al-Musayyib, ‘Ikrimah, al-Hasan, Qutaadah, al-A’mash, Sulaymaan al-Taymi and al-Oozaa’i said concerning the aayaah (interpretation of the meaning),

“Verily, the dwellers of Paradise, that Day, will be busy in joyful things” [Yaa-Seen 36:55]

they said, (it means) they will be busy deflowering virgins. Ibn ‘Abbaas (may Allaah be pleased with him) said, according to a report narrated from him, that “busy in joyful things” means listening to stringed instruments. Abu Haatim said: he misheard the phrase iftidaad al-abkaar (deflowering virgins) and thought it was samaa’ al-awtaar (listening to stringed instruments). In fact the correct phrase is iftidaad al-abkaar (deflowering virgins). (Ibn Katheer, 3/564)

With regard to children, the scholars differed as to whether children would be born as a result of this intercourse or not. Some said that there would be children if the man wants them, but the pregnancy and birth would take just one hour. Abu Sa’eed al-Khudri (may Allaah be pleased with him) narrated that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If the believer wants a child in Paradise, the pregnancy and delivery will take only an hour, then the child will be the age that the man wants.” (Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, no. 2487; al-Daarimi, no. 2712; Ahmad, no. 11339; Ibn Maajah, no. 4329). And Allaah knows best.

We ask Allaah to admit us to Paradise and to keep us far away from the Fire. May He bless us with the highest Firdaws, for He is the One Who is Able to do that. Praise be to Allaah the Lord of the Worlds.
Islam Q&A
Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

Sex-change operations

Is it permitted for a person to change his sex from a woman to a man or vice versa? Please give evidence from the Qur’aan and Sunnaah
Praise be to Allaah. It is not permissible for a person to change sex from male to female or vice versa. The Muslim has to be content with what Allaah has decreed, for He has placed him in a suitable position. He does not know – perhaps if he was female that would not be good for him, or if she was male that would be bad for her. Similarly, there are some people for whom nothing but poverty is good, and if Allaah made such a person rich it would be harmful for him; and there are others for whom nothing but richness is appropriate, and if they became poor that would be harmful to them. Some women wished that they could be men who would fight in the way of Allaah. This was just wishful thinking, but Allaah revealed the prohibition of that wishful thinking in the aayah (interpretation of the meaning): “And wish not for the things in which Allaah has made some of you to excel others. For men there is reward for what they have earned, (and likewise) for women there is reward for what they have earned” [al-Nisaa’ 4:32] If mere wishful thinking is forbidden, then how about taking action based on that? If the Muslim is forbidden to change the creation of Allaah in minor cases, so how about changing sex altogether? Shaykh ‘Abd al-Kareem al-Khudayr Changing one’s sex is a kind of tampering with the creation of Allaah and following the way of the Shaytaan who vowed that he would misguide the sons of Adam in this way and in others, as Allaah tells us that he said: “and indeed I will order them to change the nature created by Allaah” [al-Nisaa’ 4:119 – interpretation of the meaning] We ask Allaah to keep us safe and sound. Islam Q&A Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid

Differences between semen (maniy) and urethral fluid (madhiy)

some times when i wake up in the morning, i find some wet coming out. Please don't take it as a wet dream, or urine, becuase the sticky stuff comes out usually just after i have woken up in the morning. Most of the days i have to wash my under wear just becasue of that, and sometimes i wash my pants too. I read it somewhere that if its not semen, just that sticky stuff than we don't need to perform ghusl, and only wuzu is enough to offer prayers. If it is then what about the clothes?. The same stuff comes out during some salacious situations also, though i try to stay away from all that kind of stuff. The first difference: qualities Semen in the case of men is a thick, white liquid, and in the case of women it is thin and yellow. (Translator’s note: the word maniy is used to refer to the fluid secreted by either male or female at the time of orgasm). The source for these descriptions of maniy come from the hadeeth of Umm Sulaym (may Allaah be pleased with her), who asked the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) about a woman who sees a dream like a man sees (i.e., an erotic dream). The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “If a woman sees that, she should do ghusl.” Umm Sulaym said: I felt shy when I heard that. She asked, “Is that possible?” The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “How else would the child resemble his father or mother? The water of the man is thick and white, and the water of the woman is thin and yellow. Whichever of the two prevails or comes first decides which parent the child will resemble.” (Agreed upon. Saheeh Muslim, 469). In his commentary on Saheeh Muslim (3/222), Imaam al-Nawawi said, concerning the words of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) “The water of the man is thick and white, and the water of the woman is thin and yellow”: “This is an important criterion in describing maniy. This description applies when a person is healthy, and in most cases. The scholars said: when a man is healthy, his semen is white and thick, and gushes out in spurts accompanied by feelings of pleasure. After it has come out, it is followed immediately by a feeling of being drained and exhausted. Its smell is like that of palm tree pollen, which in turn resembles the smell of dough… (the colour of semen may change for a number of reasons, including the following): … If a person is sick his semen may become thin and yellow, or his testicles may become slack or soft, with the result that the emission of semen is not accompanied by any feelings of pleasure. If a man engages in intercourse too frequently, his semen may become red and resemble the juice that comes from meat, or may even contain blood [‘ameet???]. There are three distinguishing features of semen, the presence of any of which is sufficient for it to be classified as semen: firstly, its emission is accompanied by feelings of pleasure and is immediately followed by exhaustion; secondly, it smells like palm tree pollen, as stated above; and thirdly, it gushes out in spurts. Each one of these three characteristics is sufficient for it to be defined as semen; it is not necessary for all three features to be present. If none of them are present, the substance cannot be described as semen and in all likelihood it is not. All of the above applies to the maniy of men; in the case of women, their maniy is thin and yellow, although it could become white if the woman is strong. It has two distinguishing characteristics, either of which is sufficient to class the substance as maniy: firstly, it smells like the maniy of men, and secondly, its emission is accompanied by feelings of pleasure and is immediately followed by exhaustion.” Madhiy, on the other hand, is a sticky white fluid that is emitted when a person is thinking of or desiring intercourse. Its emission is not accompanied by feelings of pleasure, it does not gush out in spurts, and it is not followed by exhaustion. This may happen to men and women alike, although it is more common among women. This is the comment of Imaam al-Nawawi in his commentary on Muslim (Sharh Muslim, 3/213). The second difference: what should be done after emission of either type of fluid When maniy is emitted, a person must perform ghusl to clean himself from sexual impurity (janaabah), whether this happened during intercourse or otherwise, whether he was awake or it happened because of an erotic dream. Madhiy, on the other hand, means that a person only needs to do wudoo’. The evidence for this is the report of ‘Ali ibn Abi Taalib (may Allaah be pleased with him) who said: “I was a man who used to experience a lot of urethral discharge, so I told Miqdaad to ask the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) about it. So he asked him, and he said: ‘It requires wudoo’.’” (Agreed upon; this version was narrated by al-Bukhaari). Ibn Qudaamah said in al-Mughni (1/168), “Ibn al-Mundhir said: ‘The scholars agree that passing stools or urine, the emission of madhiy or passing wind are all things that invalidate tahaarah (purity) [i.e. they mean that wudoo’ must be renewed]’.” The third difference: whether they are taahir (pure) or naajis (impure) Maniy is taahir according to the most correct opinion among the scholars. The evidence for this is the report of ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her) who said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to wash the maniy (from his clothes) then go out to pray wearing the same clothes, and I could see the spot where he had washed it.” (Agreed upon). According to a report narrated by Muslim: “I used to rub it (semen) thoroughly from the garment of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him), then he would pray in it.” According to another version: “I would scratch it from his garment with my nail when it had become dry.” It is proven that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to leave it without washing it when it was wet; it was sufficient just to wipe it with ‘ood (a kind of aromatic wood) or something similar, as was reported by Imaam Ahmad in his Musnad (6/243) from ‘Aa’ishah (may Allaah be pleased with her), who said: “The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) used to remove maniy from his garment with a twig of adhkhar (a kind of tree), then pray in that garment, and he would rub it from his garment once it was dry, and would pray in the same garment.” Ibn Khuzaymah reported it in his Saheeh, and Shaykh al-Albaani classed it as hasan in al-Irwa’ (1/197). Madhiy (urethral discharge) is naajis (impure), because of the hadeeth of ‘Ali quoted above, in some versions of which it is reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) commanded him to wash his penis and testicles and do wudoo’, as was reported by Abu ‘Awaanah in al-Mustakhraj. Ibn Hajar said in al-Talkhees: “There is nothing at fault in this isnaad.” So madhiy is naajis and the penis and testicles must be washed, as it nullifies tahaarah. Ruling concerning clothing on which there is semen or urethral discharge As maniy is deemed to be taahir, if it gets on a person’s clothes it does not make them impure, and if he prays in those clothes there is nothing wrong with that. Ibn Qudaamah said in al-Mughni (1/763): “Even though we say it is taahir, it is better to rub it, but if one prays (in those clothes) without rubbing it, this is acceptable.” In the case of madhiy, it is sufficient to sprinkle water on it, because of the difficulty of doing otherwise. The evidence for this is the hadeeth narrated by Abu Dawud in his Sunan from Sahl ibn Haneef, who said: “I used to experience a lot of urethral discharge, and I used to do ghusl a lot. I asked the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) about it and he said: ‘It is sufficient for you to do wudoo’ (to purify yourself) from that.’ I said, ‘O Messenger of Allaah, what about when it gets on my clothes?’ He said: ‘It is sufficient for you to take a handful of water and sprinkle it on your clothes wherever you think (the madhiy) is.’” (Reported by al-Tirmidhi. He said: This is a saheeh hasan hadeeth, and the only other hadeeth about madhiy that we know is the hadeeth of Muhammad ibn Ishaaq). The author of Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi (1/373) said: “This may be taken to prove that if madhiy gets on one's clothes, it is sufficient to sprinkle water on it; one does not have to wash it.” And Allaah knows best. Islam Q&A Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid